Although being highly sensitive is a gift, it is also a challenge, and one negative aspect of being an HSP is food sensitivities. Even after reading articles explaining HSPs can not tolerate certain food groups, such as gluten and dairy, I never thought I was sensitive to food, because I'd never experienced any catastrophic physical symptoms like nausea, diarrhea, or stomach cramps.
Since high school, though, I'd been tired and bloated and suffering from anxiety and depression, which worsened after moving away to college. Soon, I started counseling, trying to figure out what was bothering me, and started taking antidepressants, trying three different kinds for over a year before giving up. Nothing seemed to work, and I began thinking I just wasn't meant to be normal, I was highly sensitive, and depression and anxiety came along with the territory, so I should just accept them. Then, a month before starting my junior year of college, I decided not to go back, I just didn't have the strength or the energy to leave home and struggle through classes, pretending I was fine.
It was devastating, I wanted to go back, I felt like a failure and a quitter. Desperately, I spent my free time searching for an answer to why my body seemed to be attacking me, and had almost given up hope of ever feeling normal when I heard Ane Axford, of www.sensitiveandthriving.com, talk about HSPs and food sensitivities via a web video chat. One main topic she discussed was Celiac's Disease, being intolerant to gluten. I'd heard of Celiac's before, but never paid much attention to what it was since I'd never been diagnosed with it. She addressed her own battle with Celiac's, and said even if one doesn't have the disease, she can still be sensitive to gluten, that it can even make her anxious or depressed.
Hallelujah! I thought, finally something that makes sense, something I can easily try. So, the next day, I didn't eat any bread, pasta, or packaged junk from the cupboard, instead, I filled up on fruit, vegetables, rice and potatoes, and felt like a brand new person. Finally, I had energy, and was more relaxed and happy, I imagined it was the way the non-sensitives of the world got to feel every day, while getting to eat whatever they wanted. But I wasn't bitter, and I'm still not, I'm just grateful to finally be healthy and feel the way I should've felt all along.
I discovered a whole new layer to my sensitivity I hadn't thought existed, and now, I understand how very careful I must be with my delicate, sensitive self.
Sunday, January 30, 2011
Sunday, January 16, 2011
Understanding HSPs
About a year ago, I was scanning the shelves of Barnes and Noble, waiting for my sister to check out so we could leave the busy store. I'd been feeling more and more tired since the moment I'd walked through the doors, and I remember thinking, "There's too much to look at in here, it's exhausting."That's when I spotted a book in the self-help section entitled, "The Highly Sensitive Person: How to Thrive When the World Overwhelms You," by Elaine N. Aron. Immediately, it caught my attention. Reading the title again, I thought, this sounds like me, but are there actually other people in the world who feel the same way? I grabbed the book and began reading the back to find out what a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP) actually is. "Do you have a keen imagination and vivid dreams?" It asked. "Is time alone each day as essential to you as food and water? Are you 'too shy' or 'too sensitive' according to others? Do noise and confusion quickly overwhelm you?"
I couldn't believe what I was reading. This is me, I thought, and obviously I'm not the only one in the world feeling abnormal and isolated, because somebody wrote this book. It was like I'd been stuck in a room, and the only way out was a door that had been closed and dead bolted, and that door had just flung wide open. I was free to walk out and roam, taking in all the sights, sounds, and smells of this new world I'd just been introduced to. It was a true comfort to realize I was not alone in feeling overwhelmed by people, places, noises, and life in general. Everyone seemed to know exactly how to live and thrive in this mile-a-minute world, and I had no clue. I thought for sure I was the only one, but this book proved otherwise.
It became my bible. I read it, reread it, studied it, thanked God for it, even slept with it under my pillow, hoping to absorb any scrap of information I may have missed. I breathed in every word, wanting desperately to understand myself and others like me, as Dr. Aron made me believe I was okay, that it was normal to take more enjoyment out of being alone, journaling, reading or drawing, instead of partying with a mob of friends, like it seemed everyone else was doing. That there's nothing wrong with me when I feel completely drained and irritated after being in a mall, grocery store, or cafeteria, it's just my highly sensitive nervous system being overworked without any kind of filter allowing me to tune out extra noises, objects, and movement. That all HSPs feel every emotion more deeply, which is why we get our feelings hurt so easily and why other people's moods affect us so much.
She taught me that even though we HSPs are a minority, only 15 to 20 percent of the population, we have a whole lot to offer, and its time we start realizing our strengths, and thriving off of them, instead of hiding away in a world we once felt we did not belong.
I have found some great information on HSPs at these sites:
http://sensitiveandthriving.com/
http://www.blogcatalog.com/blogs/hsp-notes
http://www.hsperson.com/index.html
I couldn't believe what I was reading. This is me, I thought, and obviously I'm not the only one in the world feeling abnormal and isolated, because somebody wrote this book. It was like I'd been stuck in a room, and the only way out was a door that had been closed and dead bolted, and that door had just flung wide open. I was free to walk out and roam, taking in all the sights, sounds, and smells of this new world I'd just been introduced to. It was a true comfort to realize I was not alone in feeling overwhelmed by people, places, noises, and life in general. Everyone seemed to know exactly how to live and thrive in this mile-a-minute world, and I had no clue. I thought for sure I was the only one, but this book proved otherwise.
It became my bible. I read it, reread it, studied it, thanked God for it, even slept with it under my pillow, hoping to absorb any scrap of information I may have missed. I breathed in every word, wanting desperately to understand myself and others like me, as Dr. Aron made me believe I was okay, that it was normal to take more enjoyment out of being alone, journaling, reading or drawing, instead of partying with a mob of friends, like it seemed everyone else was doing. That there's nothing wrong with me when I feel completely drained and irritated after being in a mall, grocery store, or cafeteria, it's just my highly sensitive nervous system being overworked without any kind of filter allowing me to tune out extra noises, objects, and movement. That all HSPs feel every emotion more deeply, which is why we get our feelings hurt so easily and why other people's moods affect us so much.
She taught me that even though we HSPs are a minority, only 15 to 20 percent of the population, we have a whole lot to offer, and its time we start realizing our strengths, and thriving off of them, instead of hiding away in a world we once felt we did not belong.
I have found some great information on HSPs at these sites:
http://sensitiveandthriving.com/
http://www.blogcatalog.com/blogs/hsp-notes
http://www.hsperson.com/index.html
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